So when Nick told me what time he was going to be home and then was running very, very late my mind started to race. I tried to keep myself busy...I watched tv, made dinner, cleaned up the kitchen, checked Facebook (two, maybe three times), sent out a few e-mails, even checked my work e-mail. I wanted to call him, but then in the back of my mind I told myself, "No. Don't be one of those naggy, whiny wives."
Ugh..."When are you coming home? Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you with?..."
But then road conditions had been terrible so my mind went to work yet again.
Well Nick made it home just fine, late, but fine. My nerves were a little haywire and I was upset he hadn't called or used someone else's phone when his died.
And to top it all off I was late, too. Not late to get home, but ya know late. The time of the month came and nothing happened. (I do have to note that by medical standards I wasn't really, truly late just later than what I was use to. That's where my imagination starts giving me trouble.)
So needless to say Nick being late, in the actual sense of the word, sent me into overdrive.
I was huffing and puffing through the kitchen telling him how worried I was, how upset he would be if I did this...I went on and on and on and on. Then out of nowhere I blurt out, "And I haven't started my period" as I immediately burst into tears.
Nick was dumbfounded. Here he was getting a verbal lashing as he was apologizing profusely when the conversation takes a complete 180 and he finds out his wife may be pregnant.
I turned into a blubbering idiot as Nick gave me the biggest hug. All I could say was, "But I don't want to be pregnant".
Since before we were ever married we said we wanted to wait at least a few years before we even tried to start a family. We love spending time with our friends who have babies and kids, but we always have said we're not ready yet.
I didn't want parenthood thrust upon us when we weren't planning. I looked at Nick pitifully with mascara running down my cheeks and said randomly, "Can we take a baby to Europe?" As if for some reason our child would not be able to obtain his or her passport.
Within a five minute tear-filled moment my mind had flashed to how we would be able to travel like we wanted to where would we put a nursery to my growing belly and swollen ankles to labor and delivery to losing baby weight. I was a wreck.
Then Nick looked at me and laughed (nervously), "It would be pretty cool if you were. We've been married a while now." A shift in our relationship happened that night. I honestly knew right then and there that no matter what the outcome we COULD do this, not only because we would have no other choice but to become parents, but because we'd be in it together.
I know pretty cheesy, huh?
I hate to cut into the suspense, but we found out there will be no little Nichole or Nick brought into this world...a day later. All that emotion and chaos! Talk about jumping the gun.
© Nichole DeMario, 2010 – 2012. All rights reserved
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